One thing you can't hide is when you're crippled inside

My New Year's Eve was spent at home in the grip of a head cold that decided to assert itself full bore early in the evening. I'd had a few options concerning invites out, but once my health took a downward turn, I didn't feel like doing much of anything short of staying in bed. I managed to do some yoga before the malady really took to slapping me around.

I wasn't terribly depressed about staying in. I watched an episode of The Tudors, read a lot, and meditated. And slept. Exciting? Certainly not, but you've got to make the best of what's in front of you. Today, I feel slightly better. I went out early to grocery store for supplies, mainly liquids and throat drops. The rest of the day I spent in bed watching some of the Winter Classic and a couple of episodes of The Tudors. And I slept. Let it not be said that I haven't started the new year of with a bang.

Let's hand out some more awards.


Best Encounter With A Bear

Our camping trip in New Hampshire this summer. Didn't get to see it, but nearly everyone else did. The first sighting was when Baby Boy Z darted off into the woods after it, the second late at night while I slept like an angel of pure light. Good thing for the bear it didn't run into me. I would have choked the bitch out!

Best book

All four of the novels comprising The Berrybender Narratives. When I finished the last page of the last book, well, I almost teared up. Larry McMurtry, you had me at hello.

Best Brawl

4th of July, Mike's place. Like with the bear incident, I missed this one too. If only I had stayed a bit longer, maybe Mike would have had someone else on his side other than his girlfriend, who, from what I hear, threw down like a champ. Maybe, but I probably would have been a chicken baby like the rest of 'em. Probably for the best that I wasn't there.


"I Thought This Only Happened In Stupid Comedies" award

The other day I put a pair of pants on quickly, forgoing the boxers, and paid a dear price. During a visit to the bathroom , I unzipped my pants hard and fast and, well , I think you can figure out the rest. No? Okay, I'll come out and say it: My guy got caught in the zipper. Not going to lie to you- it really, really hurt. Did I learn my lesson? Absolutely not. No, rather than put on a pair of boxers as a preventative measure, I kept things as they were and guess what happened during another visit to the bathroom? Same spot, too. And it should go without saying that it really, really, hurt. I've done some pretty loutish things in my life, but this one forced me to take a good, hard look at myself. (I'm no Kreskin, but I'd be willing to bet Kate would rather see this award dubbed the TMI award)

"This Is Your Life" award

This one goes to Facebook. Very surreal when you see people from all sectors of your life, past and present -- friends, family, coworkers, etc. -- responding to the same thread. It's kind of cool and kind of weird. It's a new world.

Most Uncomfortable Experience

When Foley "complimented" a woman for not wearing a bra. Everyone in the room heard it; the silence was palpable. Oddly, she wasn't flattered by his kind words. I was sitting next to Foley, but at that moment I wanted to be six thousand miles away.


Proof We're All Cattle award

When Janelle and I saw Inglorious Basterds at the Showcase Cinema in Lowell, we could barely hear the movie with all the slobbering, chewing, and gnashing that was going on in the theater. I'd call it grazing, but that would be insulting to the animals that graze. They have more grace.

Best Disappearing Act

Luke Warm. One minute he was there and then "poof" he was gone. Been months since I've seen or spoken with him.

Best Network Television Show

Lost. This last season was its best. It catered to the true fans, which meant it wasn't dumbed down for casual and stupid viewers. No, either you were on board or you weren't. Heavy on the SciFi and convoluted as all get out. The next and final season is upon us. I am thrilled.

Ok, that's enough for one post. I need to go shower or eat or something other than this. Happy New Year!