You thought the leaden winter would bring you down forever, but you rode upon a steamer to the violence of the sun

Talked with my sister yesterday. We've been out of touch since Christmas. These things happen; we were both startled, however, at how the months flew by. It was good catching up with her. She told me about the mild agoraphopia she's developed. I was a little disturbed at the news, but not terribly surprised. After all, I've had my own issues with panic disorder. We both agreed that her recognizing what's been happening is a significant step toward recovery. These matters must be nipped in the bud early on else they grow into a thing of colossal horrors. I know of what I speak.

I got to thinking about my family history and how it relates to both my sister and I having issues with anxiety. In many ways, I feel mine are mostly behind me, but I still have to contend with its subtle gossamer vines just about every day of my life. I hope, having gone through something similar, I'll be able to help my sister out some. I hope I can, because going through that on my own was not a Sunday picnic. Let me clarify: I didn't go through it alone in the sense that I didn't have support, but no one I knew had a frame of reference for what I was going through.
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Finished watching the only season of John: From Cincinnati last night. Milch was bold with this series. He left behind one of the greatest shows ever in Deadwood to develop one about the son of God influencing members of a surfing community. That kind of describes it, but it sounds too definitive and, if I really spent some time thinking about it, off the mark. That's what was cool about the show and also why it was vexing. There were moments throughout the season, and there were more than a few, that were sublime. David Milch is one of our great writer/thinkers and, even at it's worst, the show was pretty good, if only because it was so ambitious. I've not been one to take too many chances, but I admire people that do.

The show's weaknesses can be found in the acting, the characters, and the unfortunate outcome of being canceled. Concerning the last, I was listening to Milch's commentary over the last episode and he said it was difficult holding back the tears as he watched. He was so invested in the show that it crushed him when it wasn't re-upped for a second season. He had framed the season with subsequent ones in mind. This accounts for most, if not all, of the loose ends left behind.

The acting was uneven. There were some great actors on the show and some mediocre ones. Hmm...let me revise my assessment a touch. Now that I think of it, most of the actors were skilled; only a couple were poor (I learned later that they had never acted before ). I think the problem was even the good actors had trouble with some of the dialog. Which, I guess makes their acting not so good if they can't figure out a way to make the lines work. You gotta blame Milch, too, though. He wrote the stuff. Anywaaaaaaaay, some of the dialog came off flat. Tell you what, though: Ed O'neill sold every single line that came out of his mouth. Some of his monologues were exquisite to behold.

The characterization was another thing I think could have been better. I found it difficult relating to most of the characters. Of course, I didn't grow up in a small surfing community. Shouldn't matter, though: if the characters are believable and sympathetic, it doesn't matter where the story takes place.

Would I watch the show again? Most definitely. I have a strong suspicion that it will get better with subsequent viewings.
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Trying to be positive today, but it's been a battle. The fact that it's Monday and rainy hasn't made it easy. I'm doing my best. That's all I can do. Think I might watch Guy Maddin's Dracula. It's a ballet. Should be interesting.