Been feeling knotted up, tense. Not such a recent development, but lately it's been pretty rough. Reading in bed last night, I was alarmed to discover a steady surge of tension had been coursing through my body almost the entire duration. I don't know what bothered me most: the fact that I was feeling that way for no apparent reason or the fact that it took me a while to notice. I laughed a "what the fuck?" laugh and determined to bring out the Zen.
I observed with detachment how I was feeling and soon felt better. To combat this tough patch in my life, which has been ongoing for a long time now, only less severe, I've been meditating at night. It has helped I've been able be clear headed enough to see that I can't continue like this, that if I do, I will surely meet my end, in one way or another. Fortunately, I'm pure of heart and wise like a rishi.
I've come to a decision, based on what I've been going through, that will change my life if I take the necessary steps. And when I say change my life, I mean for the better. This low point has the potential to be the impetus that spurs me to action. As things develop, I will divulge more.
An interesting time, to be sure, though I could do with out so much peril. A time also to learn who your friends are. There's at least one I've a mind to do without right now, but, overall, I'm lucky to have the friends I have, that endure all my nonsense.
Time to continue prepping for Saturday night. I've assembled a set list, which is all well and good, but a number of the songs are not finished. I'll get by: this is a casual affair and nothing to get to worked up over.
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2 comments:
we don't always get happy endings, do we? but, you're in luck - i'll be right over to give you one!
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