Trapped amid fusions of wonder

A scratchy throat and a mild feeling of fatigue greeted me upon waking this morning. I ate breakfast, visited the grocery store, came home and practiced yoga. I hoped the activity would revive me to my previously hale state. Sadly, it didn't make much of a difference. We will see how things shape up. I'd prefer not to be sick at the dawning of a new work week, or at all, but last time I checked, I was still a human organism that finds itself ill on occasion.

The past week flew by. Thanksgiving was a blur. Along with Spira and Missy the dog, I went to my parent's house for turkey and other holiday fare. Spira and I helped my sister figure out how to align her iPod with iTunes and then we set my nieces, Kiley and Shannon, with Facebook accounts. Missy was a hit with the kids - they gave her attention while Spira and I were preoccupied with the computer.

From there, we went to my grandmother's house for dessert. It wasn't a full house. A couple of my cousin's were absent, my mother stayed behind because of a sinus infection, my brother in law was home with a stomach virus, and Al Roker was nowhere to be seen, despite the hundreds of invitations I had sent him. Oh, well, it was still a good time. I spent a good amount of time finding out how my cousin Brian's FBI training was going. A lot of effort, but well worth it, he told me. My father probed him about whether there was a division that handled cases like The X Files. Brian wouldn't say.
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Yesterday, I went on that date I alluded to in my last post. About a month ago, Spira had mentioned she thought I'd be compatible with her friend Lauren. She showed me some pictures of her on Facebook (I thought she was attractive) and told me a little about her. "Alright, then, work your magic", I said.

Nothing came of it until I received a call from Spira last weekend, confessing she accidentally set me up on a date with Lauren. The two had been talking that day about a guy Lauren was about to go on a date with who didn't seem that enthused. Spira told her about me and how she thought we'd be compatible. She showed her some pictures of me and went into depth, I'm sure, about my pure heart. Spira told her there was a good chance we'd meet at one of the next art exhibits at the studio the two of them rent rooms from. Instead, Lauren asked Spira to give me her number. Way to expedite, Lauren.

I called her on Tuesday and left a voice mail. She left me a voice mail the following morning. And then another voicemail by me later on that day. After that, we communicated through texts. I spoke to her the first time when I met up with her at Block 11 for coffee.

It was such a nice day, we sat outside. My first thought about her was that she was more attractive in person. And, the more time I spent with her, the more I picked up on a kindness about her I found appealing. We talked about music (Sonic Youth used to be a favorite band of hers), yoga (she's a fairly devout practitioner), the nonsensical nature of Black Friday shopping, her upbringing in Europe and the states, her job (she's an art therapist), Miranda July (we're both fans), among other things.

We wrapped things up around five thirty. I walked her to her car and asked her if she'd like to go out with me again. She said she would. I asked if I could give her a hug and she said "Of course". So I did, and then, with her help, puzzled out where my car was parked (only about fifty feet ahead, as it turned out). As I walked to it, I raised my fists in the air and yelled, "I'M IN LOVE, I'M IN LOVE, I'M IN LOVE!!!!", and then I started sobbing. Ok, that didn't happen.

Not being a serial dater, I think I presented myself pretty well. I suppose I wasn't completely at ease, but who ever is on a first date? I texted Lauren today, letting her know it was a pleasure meeting her. She replied back the same sentiment. There are aspects of my life that are in disarray and in some ways I question whether I should be dating anyone at all. Things will pan out or they won't, but I'm not going to shy away. I may not be in a desirable place financially, but that is not what defines me. At the end of the day, I'm just grateful I had the opportunity to spend some time with Lauren. And, hopefully, I'll be able to spend some more with her. I'm not looking too far ahead (of course, I have been obsessively envisioning our wedding day, but whatever, everyone does that).

Cheers!