When love was the means and you were the end

A little over a week ago I was sitting at my desk at work ruminating whether it was time for me to move on. We'd been slow since before Thanksgiving; I had plenty of time to ruminate. Well before that, though, the thought of leaving had taken seed. As much as I appreciated the healthy work environment, I was feeling more and more stagnant, restless. There is zero upward mobility at my job and, despite receiving a slightly more than modest raise last year, the pay is too low. And the work had become rote, bordering on tedious; it had become increasingly difficult to be enthusiastic. So, I sat there thinking about these things. And then I got a text from Foley.

He wanted to meet up and discuss a job offer. I knew he had taken on his father's pension appraisal company a year or two ago and that it was starting to really take off. I met with him over coffee last Saturday and he offered me a job doing appraisals at close to double the pay I'm making now. I'd first need to come by their new office space in Woburn to meet with his father, who's soon to retire, but he made it clear the job was mine. His sister Mary, who I've lost touched with, but was close with in the past, and our friend Ken had been on board for awhile; I was looking forward to seeing them again.

I left work early yesterday and interviewed with Foley's dad for a bit. He formally offered me the job and I accepted gladly. I left feeling grateful for the gifts that have come my way. I'll be working with at least two of my closest friends in a small scale work environment and making a lot more money; I'll be carpooling with Foley (he lives a couple of blocks away) and won't have to worry about my car so much; I'm recently engaged. Life is good.

All of this happened while Veronica was away (she comes home tomorrow), but she's been so supportive (she's supportive no matter what I'm doing) and happy for me. Our life together is starting off well. With more financial security between my new job and her teaching, which is starting to boom, we've been discussing things like getting a dog (we're going to get a greyhound thanks to Missy D just about ruining us for all other dogs) and saving money for a new place (we'll stay here as long as we can because of the location and low rent). It'll be such a relief not having to stress about money all the time.

Yesterday marked the three year anniversary of my dad's passing; it was nice having something joyous to discuss with my mother on an otherwise somber day for her. She knows it hasn't always been easy for me in this life. Her joy was palpable.

I'm grateful for the positive changes in my life but I do not chalk them up to mere luck. No, I manifested these changes willfully. Leading up to meeting Veronica, I tweaked a few things about myself that were holding me back from getting what I've always wanted in life and after that, everything fell into the place. We create our realities, magic is real. I know this from experience and honestly don't give a single shit whether you think otherwise.

Well, I should wrap this up. Going to practice yoga for a bit and then maybe finish watching Bergman's The Magician. I'll probably also read from a collection of Susan Sontag essays I just purchased. Or maybe I'll wonder about the Mandela effect and whether it really used to be the Berenstein Bears and not the Berenstain Bears like it is now. Look it up. For the record, I think we can chalk a lot of what constitutes the the Mandela Effect up to the infallibility of the human mind. Look it up and decide for yourself.

Bye, bitches.

You walk, surrounded by the stars, for many days

Veronica's been away since the end of last week. She's teaching at Kripalu until Sunday. The separation has been  slightly more difficult for her than for me, I think, and that, I surmise, is because I'm at home and still immersed in the comfort of my usual routines while she's sleeping in a bunk bed away from hers. Still, being apart is a drag, particularly because we are recently engaged and are coming off a nice mini vacation.

Engaged? Well, look, I've been away from this blog for a spell and a bunch has happened, including getting engaged to Veronica. The best I can offer is some back story here and there, but it can't happen all at once. This bonnie lad does not have the time for that.

Our story, how we came to be engaged, has been told by us, together and apart, briefly and at length to a lot of people. It's been a trip and, consequently, I've been preoccupied with the whole thing, the changes that have come about. Without doubt, I have found my soul mate. We both knew it right away, before we met in person. Hell, we knew something was up before our first phone call! Afterward, I stood in my mother's bathroom for about twenty minutes in a dopey haze, wondering what had just happened.And days before we met I ended a post in this blog that conveyed I was on the precipice of some positive changes.

It was in the air.

Because our union took form so quickly and cohesively, it has had a surreal cast to it. We weren't sure how people would react, whether they'd think we were insane. Thankfully, most everyone has been supportive and happy for us (there's one sour apple, which is a bummer,but I'm not dwelling on it). In fact, a lot of people have nodded their heads and said things to the effect of "when it's right, things fall together quickly and effortlessly". Overall, it doesn't matter what anyone thinks, but it's nice when what they think is favorable.

Alright, freaks, I've got an agenda for the night and it involves less blogging.

See ya!

I can see its lucidity so clear

Ah, the Paris attacks, etc. Dark activities. The world becomes more and more surreal to me; I don't trust official narratives, cognitive dissonance abounds. Fear is distributed and lapped up in higher and higher doses.The Hegelian Dialectic courses through our collective veins. And yet, for all the deception and fear mongering, I see more and more people starting to question what we're being fed. And, no matter what, love shines through it all. How can it not? We are in the Kali Yuga cycle but love is ever present and abiding, even when it seems it isn't. That is why I tune out the noise and try to project love, levity, compassion. Take care of the micro and the macro will follow suit. Or, free your mind and your ass will follow. Or some shit.

Anyway

Veronica and I had a busy weekend. We went to my mom's on Saturday for some raking and gutter cleaning. We took her out for Vietnamese food afterward. It took some gentle coaxing, but she ended up liking it quite a bit. From there, we went to the H Mart in Burlington and loaded up on Asian food. On Sunday, we went to Norwood to pick up some of her belongings at her storage unit and at her house. Busy weekend, but gratifying.

Veronica's birthday is coming up and it'll be a challenge getting her something since we're together almost all of the time. I'll figure something out. Hopefully, if the planets align just right, we'll be getting our tattoo bracelets on her birthday. It'll be our first day house sitting at Spira's while she's in Iceland; it'll be a short walk to Skin Art. We're excited to see what Janelle comes up with design-wise.

Ok, lovers. Enough out of me for one day. Time to move on to other, sexier, things.

Hustle bones coming out my mouth

A great weekend. V and I took a relaxed approach to it; we walked to Union Sq. Saturday morning and got some doughnuts at Union Sq. Doughnuts  (salted caramel and bourbon was a highlight, but they all were) and coffee at Bloc 11.We lounged around the remainder of the day. I worked on music, we read, pursued amorous impulses,etc. Later on, we went out for dumplings and soup, visited our local adult store, hit Whole Foods for some supplies and baked treats (it was a decadent day it seems).

We talked about where we might like to move to in the spring and hashed out wedding ideas (didn't take long to arrive at what we want). We're so well matched; our decision making is smoother and quicker than I've experienced with anyone else. Ever.

Last night we sat and listened to the new Julia Holter record (holy shit it's transcendent!) and made a tasty lentil soup. We're passing two months as a couple and each day we love each other more.If this is the honeymoon period, I'm glad we took an extended one. I know at least a couple of you do not want to hear any of this, are not happy for my situation, but I don't really care. I'm with the love of my life and don't have time for what the kids like to call haters.

Oh, I could go on.

Time is short, though, so I'm out of here.

Bye, lovers!

All I want to do is get high on the beach

It's a slow day at work and here I am writing a blog. Bad boy, but not too bad; I'm spacing this out and not stealing too much company time all at once.At least that's how I'm choosing to rationalize it.

Anyway

It's been a while since my last post. Being in a relationship, a full time for reals one, has shaken up my routine. Not in a bad way, no, but coming from years of bachelorhood, it's been an adjustment. Hence the infrequent posts. Well, there's also been a general lack of motivation to keep this blog going, I must admit. Don't despair, readers, I'm here now and all is right in the universe. Or not. Who am I to say?

Amanda works at my office now or, more aptly put, again. She used to work here years ago and now she's back. It's been great having her here. Lots of laughs, etc.Ah, but when the winter is over, things will be different.

Veronica is making a meal of white fish, roasted sweet potatoes, and sauteed spinach tonight. Should be ready by the time I walk into the door. It's a great thing having a partner who is a chef among other things. I've been eating like royalty. Not a bad way to start the weekend.

Alright, I'm going to wrap this up. Don't feel right doing this at work so....

I'll be back, lovers. Ciao!

Stumbling over melted moonlight

Yeah, so clearly there's been a gap between my last post and this one that's fairly sizable. Well, there are reasons for that, one of which is that I've been preoccupied with Veronica. Who is Veronica? She's the love of my life, the one I'll eventually marry.

Aside from two blocks of time she was away (the last trip, a meditation retreat in PA with no cell phone service was a long five days for the both of us) we've been inseparable.

How did we meet? The answer to that will have to be piecemeal, if proffered at all. There's a lot to cover and I'm not sure I have the ambition to attempt it all in one post. So, we'll see.

It will have to suffice that we knew right away, even before we met in person, that this was going to be special. And it has been. She's everything I've ever wanted, and more, in a mate. She tells me the same is true with me and I believe her.

Amore.

I'll be back, dear readers.

Hold on, Yoko, Yoko hold on, It's going to be alright

A lengthier hiatus than usual. My apologies to those of you who enjoy reading from this blog and lucky you to those of you who find it a tedious affair all around.

Anyway

I'm just checking in,  but I wanted to let you know I'm still among the living. I plan on writing a proper post in the next few days. Big changes in my life. Good ones!

See you soon, lovers